of Love

The mere sight of you makes my heart pound. My breathing quickens and my hands shake. Ah, my little heart, can’t you be calm? You smile and suddenly my whole world is upside down. I can’t think straight all I can see is you and that pretty smile. Oh, what I would give for that smile to last forever? Everything and anything. I wish you could always look at me the way you did then.  

Oh, my heart. It flutters at the sight of you and I breathe a little sigh. There are some pretty words exchanged and I feel loved by you. Then, as quickly as it came, it is gone as you turn away from me. There lies the cold reality. You do not truly care. Your words are empty and careless contrasting your warm and welcoming tone. Your smile invites, your arms embrace but there is no love between us. Ah, my heart, be still! I cannot continue like this! Your words scorn me and they hurt more than you know. Oh, my tender little heart, how foolish am I for this?

You were smiling again; I like seeing you happy.

some days i don’t feel pretty. this is one of those days.

I like to believe, not because it will save me if I am wrong, not because of an image, I believe because I like the thought of someone loving me no matter what, someone who will forgive me when I screw up. I am not sure what I believe in, but I know something out there will love me. I just have to find it. I know you don’t understand now what I am going through and you never will, I accept that knowledge. I need you not to understand but to accept this in return: I do not know what I believe in anymore. I like God and Jesus, but not the whole “organized faith” thing. I feel like I can live my faith without the need of a church, I am happy without it. Right now, I don’t know what I truly believe. But I don’t worry, someone will forgive me if I question. Questions bring answers after all.

laughter is the most beautiful sound in the world.